All of the gold spray painted robots in Westworld
When it happened: Season 1, Episode 5, “Contrapasso”
What made it hot: Somewhere an antiques dealer has fainted after watching all of these writhing, spray-painted bodies have sex on this furniture. This orgy definitely had a theme, and the theme was Human Trophies Imitating Bad Porn.
Elijah and Dill, Girls
When it happened: Season 5, Episode 4, “Old Loves”
What made it hot: Awww, little buddies! It’s like they’ve never heard of lube before! Little buds, trying to play slip ‘n’ slide with no running water. It just doesn’t work that way.
Matt and That Damn Witch In The Woods aka LADY GAGA, American Horror Story: Roanoke
When it happened: Season 6, Episode 3, “Chapter 3”
What made it hot: What the fuck. Just what in the actual fuck. Look at these gifs and tell me you won’t forever have Cuba Gooding Jr. giving it to Lady Gaga in a forest burned into your memory. UNSUBSCRIBE FROM THESE PORN GIFS.
Fleabag and that random dude, Fleabag
When it happened: Season 1, Episode 1
What made it hot: As far as ways to thank people, anal sex is definitely an untapped one (so to speak). TBH this scene was more funny than sexy, especially after the sex when Fleabag dares to wonder, “Do I have a massive arsehole?”
Quentin and Alice, The Magicians
When it happened: Season 1, Episode 10, “Homecoming”
What made it hot: You know that moment when you realize the only sexual experience a person has is watching free short porn clips? Quentin, baby, watch a porn from beginning to end to catch the foreplay that leads UP to the successful boning.
Lucy, Tom, and Annie, Easy
When it happened: Season 1, Episode 6, “Utopia”
What made it hot: I mean, could you masturbate to this? Yeah, it’s Orlando Bloom, Malin Akerman, and a girl who looks like the human version of Bambi all having a threesome. But it gets pretty awkward, because there’s a baby monitor in the room and every time their baby cries (which is often), one of them has to leave the sexy sex times to go put the thing back to sleep. Pro tip: call a sitter the next time you’re inviting your naked friend over.
Annalise and Nate, How to Get Away with Murder
When it happened: Season 3, Episode 1, “We’re Good People Now”
What made it hot: If you at all care about foreplay, then you’ll kindly direct your attention to a shirtless Nate massaging Annalise. Notice the muscles, and the I’mma fuck you good face. It’s all enough to diddle yourself to. It’s foot foreplay. Footreplay, if I may.
Shelby and Matt, American Horror Story: Roanoke
When it happened: Season 6, Episode 1, “Chapter 1”
What made it hot: First of all, don’t move into a house that’s clearly haunted or some shit. Secondly, in case you’re wondering whether to keep the lights on when you have sex, watch this episode then talk to me.
Molly and Jered, Insecure
When it happened: Season 1, Episode 6, “Guilty as Fuck”
What made it hot: If ever you start to question whether or not you should have sex against a wall, then do yourself a favor and watch this quick scene. Screaming, “YOU STILL GOT ERRANDS?” is optional.
Ralph Angel and Darla, Queen Sugar
When it happened: Season 1, Episode 3, “Thy Will Be Done”
What made it hot: Basically, get you a man who looks at you like Ralph Angel looks at Darla right before he picks her ass up and carries her inside for some sex.
Christine and David, The Girlfriend Experience
When it happened: Season 1, Episode 5, “Insurance”
What made it hot: It’s hard to know if a man telling you he wants to “pass out” from the sex is a good or a bad thing, but I’m going to go with good. Christine seems to enjoy sex most when she’s getting it from David, and baby girl gets a lot of sex.
Kanan and Candie, Power
When it happened: Season 3, Episode 4, “Don’t Worry Baby”
What made it hot: It’s not everyday that you see a penis onscreen. A little T&A is pretty much a given, but some DICK? No, that’s a real rare moment of pleasure. And as such, it’s impossible not to mention the moment that Kanan decides to go to town on his dick, with some help of his lady friend, Candie.
Kelly and Yorkie, Black Mirror
When it happened: Season 3, Episode 4, “San Junipero”
What made it hot: The ’80s were a time of wild hair, wilder glasses, and apparently some pretty fucking wild sexy times. Guess those damn scientists should invent time travel so we can go back and have some sex of our own. ::: calls 1-800-Scientists :::
Jack and Valerie, Casual
When it happened: Season 2, Episode 7, “Threesomes”
What made it hot: The female orgasm is a national treasure that should have a mountain in some middle America state dedicated to it. And Valerie has mountains of orgasms with Jack, even if he does turn out to be kind of a dick (so to speak).
Rick and Michonne, The Walking Dead
When it happened: Season 6, Episode 10, “The Next World”
What made it hot: Let’s talk about eating some flesh, which is a common occurrence on The Walking Dead. But in this wonderful scene it’s Michonne and Rick sucking each others faces off, and ending up in bed together. Less blood and guts, more sexy fun times. Maybe the apocalypse won’t be so bad after all…?
Dolores and William, Westworld
When it happened: Season 1, Episode 7, “Trompe L’Oeil”
What made it hot: You know how in Lars and the Real Girl Ryan Gosling has his blow-up doll girlfriend, and he talks to her, but she never talks back? Well, this is just like that. Except Dolores is the talking, actually human-like version. Robot sex seems pretty legit, y’all. ¯_(ツ)_/¯
Patrick and Jimmy (aka that dude he picked up at a bar), Looking
When it happened: OK this scene was in the Looking movie, but it’s based on the show, so we’re counting it.
What made it hot: I mean…have I been staring at the above gif for five full minutes? Yes. Will I continue to stare until someone tells me they’re feeling uncomfortable? PROBABLY, SO LEAVE ME ALONE.
Javier and Marta Ochoa, Narcos
When it happened: Season 2, Episode 3, “Our Man in Madrid”
What made it hot: ::: quietly saves this image for future, unmentionable purposes ::: So, back to what I was about to say: Pedro Pascal is a motherfucking GIFT to this world. Period.
Ghost and Angela, Power
When it happened: Season 3, Episode 1, “Call Me James”
What made it hot: If you’re like me (a little pudgy, frizzy hair, at your best when on a couch), then you’ve probably fantasized about sex in an office, specifically on a desk. And if you’re like me, this may never actually happen IRL for you. But this scene should successfully fulfill those fantasies you’ve got…probably.
Chase and Jo, Easy
When it happened: Season 1, Episode 2, “Cinderella Vegan”
What made it hot: Watching this scene is like watching how you THINK you look when you take a stranger home from a bar. When in reality, you’re both dry humping on the mattress that came with the apartment, and one of you has to leave mid-hookup to go vom real quick. But don’t worry, you’ll feel much better afterward!
Claire and Jamie, Outlander
When it happened: Season 2, Episode 13, “Dragonflies In Amber”
What made it hot: We all know what a silver lining is, and the silver lining to what was arguably the least sexy season of Outlander was this scene. Sure, everyone remains fully dressed (save for their underwear, I assume), but it was emotional and damn satisfying.
Issa and Daniel, Insecure
When it happened: Season 1, Episode 5, “Shady as Fuck”
What made it hot: Jesus, take the wheel! We’d been building to the moment Issa and Daniel join in holy sex-trimony and really COMMIT to this whole will they/won’t they thing. And hell, they definitely committed. They had sex on the couch, over a soundboard, and in all manner of positions…It also helped that Issa kept replaying the sex in the next episode. Not mad. At. All.
Misty and Luke, Luke Cage
When it happened: Season 1, Episode 1, “Moment of Truth”
What made it hot: 2016 was hard, but be good to yourself and watch this incredible sex scene in the first episode of Luke Cage. My pants literally fall off every time I remember this scene. That’s because it’s long and satisfying enough that you might forget, just for the quickest of moments, that this year was sponsored by Shit®. Thank you Luke and Misty, for saving the world with your… naughty parts.